In Matthew 6 it says that we must forgive in order to be forgiven. I can usually do that somewhat easily with people who have wronged me. (Given enough time of course)
Osama Bin Laden never wronged me personally, but I have a hard time forgiving him for what he did to so many people. I didn't lose anyone that I know on 9/11 but I know that I can't imagine how much pain he caused people who did lose a loved one. I can't help being glad that Bin Laden can never hurt another person or family again. I am not sorry he is dead. Yet I am not throwing a party either.
I saw a post on Facebook that posed an interesting thought. How does God feel about all this. I certainly don't think He is celebrating. I imagine that He is sad that another soul has been lost.
Other people are talking about justice. I think true justice for someone like him would have been less merciful than a bullet through the head. That is why I am glad to leave it to God to do the judging, punishing and rewarding. I just pray that God is more merciful with me and my hard, unforgiving heart, than I am towards people who destroy the lives of so many.
I must also say that I am so very proud of all our military men and women who risk their lives to make my life better. They are better, braver people than I ever will be! May God bless them and keep them safe!
A friend of mine posted this quote, which sums up my feelings pretty well.
"It is God who avenges me. He delivers me from my enemies. You also lift me up against those who rise against me; You have delivered me from a violent man. Therefore I will give thanks to You, O Lord, among the Gentiles, and sing praises to Your name." Psalm 18:47-50
Showing posts with label religious. Show all posts
Showing posts with label religious. Show all posts
May 2, 2011
April 1, 2011
On Mourning and Stepping out of the Boat
This has been quite the stressful week. In Texas education this week, we have been faced with the consequences of the state's budget cuts. The number of teachers and staff in my district have been laid off in the hundreds. Most of us are mourning the loss of their job or mourning for a friend who has lost their job. Many are dreading the increased workload we face next year and our inability to give each child the attention they deserve. So far, my job is safe. But I grieve the fact that I will miss my coworkers who have been laid off. I grieve the fact that so many wonderful, hard working people are now looking for employment elsewhere. (I am angry when I hear about the role that politics played in the decision making, but that is a topic for another day...and not for this venue.)
So my pregnancy hormones kick in on top of all that, and I have become a blubbering mess. I was talking to some friends. Talking, crying and journaling are how I work through my emotions, although not always in that order and not all at the same time. Anyhow, my friends, in attempt to console me, very kindly remind me that God has a plan for everyone and He will take care of them. I know this is true, because I have experienced it myself.
Last year, I perceived that God was wrenching me away from my work family and dropping me into the unknown...a different school. "How awful," I bemoaned. I wept and wept about it. Come to find out, God had placed me in a new place, more wonderful than I had imagined!
So you can see, I know this in my heart that God will care for us. It may not always be in ways we expect. God never promised it would be painless or that we would not cry over those painful parts.
Matthew 26:37-38 says, "[Jesus] took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled."
And in John 11:35 it says, "Jesus wept." When Mary told Him about Lazarus' death and how if Jesus had been there he could have prevented his death.
If Jesus can weep for His friend's anguish, then so can I! It reminds me that mourning something is not the same as lacking faith in and trust in God.
Not that I have a great deal of faith in comparison to others. I truly wish that I could face the unknown (such as layoffs) like Peter stepping out of the boat onto water. And he was said to have little faith. What does that say about me? I need God's help. God tells us many places in the Bible not to worry and not to be afraid.
I have been a Christian all my life and the faith some people have (that brave lack of worry) seems beyond my reach. They say, "I am not worried about the layoffs because I know God will care for me no matter what."
I wonder, "How did they find that kind of faith?"
I also wonder, "Is it a mask they wear to hide their doubt?" If I have been a Christian for thirty something years and I have these questions, what must an outsider or new Christian think? Part of me knows, has be taught, that the goal of showing this kind of faith is to make people wonder and desire the source of that faith, God. But the cynical side of me says that if I doubt the authenticity or attainability of the worry-free or fear-free life, how much more so would a non-believer doubt it and be turned off by this seemingly unattainable life? Perhaps this is just my selfish jealousy dismissing a challenging goal that I should strive for. I do wish desperately for it, but I am not sure how I can get from the where I am now, to where my worry-free friends are standing. Emotions like worry can't just be dismissed in the blink of an eye. I can't even seem to command them to go away. How does one go about doing that? Prayer for God's help, I suppose? I just don't know what else to do about it except, go to God in prayer.
Well, I think I have ranted enough for today. (I think I need to give myself a writing lesson on focus.)
So my pregnancy hormones kick in on top of all that, and I have become a blubbering mess. I was talking to some friends. Talking, crying and journaling are how I work through my emotions, although not always in that order and not all at the same time. Anyhow, my friends, in attempt to console me, very kindly remind me that God has a plan for everyone and He will take care of them. I know this is true, because I have experienced it myself.
Last year, I perceived that God was wrenching me away from my work family and dropping me into the unknown...a different school. "How awful," I bemoaned. I wept and wept about it. Come to find out, God had placed me in a new place, more wonderful than I had imagined!
So you can see, I know this in my heart that God will care for us. It may not always be in ways we expect. God never promised it would be painless or that we would not cry over those painful parts.
Matthew 26:37-38 says, "[Jesus] took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled."
And in John 11:35 it says, "Jesus wept." When Mary told Him about Lazarus' death and how if Jesus had been there he could have prevented his death.
If Jesus can weep for His friend's anguish, then so can I! It reminds me that mourning something is not the same as lacking faith in and trust in God.
Not that I have a great deal of faith in comparison to others. I truly wish that I could face the unknown (such as layoffs) like Peter stepping out of the boat onto water. And he was said to have little faith. What does that say about me? I need God's help. God tells us many places in the Bible not to worry and not to be afraid.
I have been a Christian all my life and the faith some people have (that brave lack of worry) seems beyond my reach. They say, "I am not worried about the layoffs because I know God will care for me no matter what."
I wonder, "How did they find that kind of faith?"
I also wonder, "Is it a mask they wear to hide their doubt?" If I have been a Christian for thirty something years and I have these questions, what must an outsider or new Christian think? Part of me knows, has be taught, that the goal of showing this kind of faith is to make people wonder and desire the source of that faith, God. But the cynical side of me says that if I doubt the authenticity or attainability of the worry-free or fear-free life, how much more so would a non-believer doubt it and be turned off by this seemingly unattainable life? Perhaps this is just my selfish jealousy dismissing a challenging goal that I should strive for. I do wish desperately for it, but I am not sure how I can get from the where I am now, to where my worry-free friends are standing. Emotions like worry can't just be dismissed in the blink of an eye. I can't even seem to command them to go away. How does one go about doing that? Prayer for God's help, I suppose? I just don't know what else to do about it except, go to God in prayer.
Well, I think I have ranted enough for today. (I think I need to give myself a writing lesson on focus.)
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